But has anyone, ever, inquired whether Commander Marlow's parenting skills and his job are perhaps one reason why the Marlow children are as they are?
It's really not part of the cultural view of mothers and fathers to ask whether a man with eight children is selfish because he doesn't devote himself to them, putting their needs before his, 100% of the time. It's not part of the culture to ask if it's wrong for a married man and a father to have a job that requires him to spend so much of his time so far from home.
It is a cultural given to demand that a woman shall prioritise her children's needs above her own (someone, evidently not carmine_rose - I got confused - suggested that it was selfish of Pam Marlow to have bought Chocbar when her children didn't even have new party clothes): and it is a cultural given to question a mother who has a job that means her primary committment can't be to childcare. Fathers aren't subject to such questions.
To quote a friend: "Because in the dictionary under 'mother' is a magic mirror-of-Erised-style picture of everyone's don't-wanna-act-like-a-grown-up fantasy, wheras under 'father' is a dot disappearing into the distance, possibly scattering money in his wake. And that does a disservice to both mothers and fathers."
no subject
It's really not part of the cultural view of mothers and fathers to ask whether a man with eight children is selfish because he doesn't devote himself to them, putting their needs before his, 100% of the time. It's not part of the culture to ask if it's wrong for a married man and a father to have a job that requires him to spend so much of his time so far from home.
It is a cultural given to demand that a woman shall prioritise her children's needs above her own (someone, evidently not
To quote a friend: "Because in the dictionary under 'mother' is a magic mirror-of-Erised-style picture of everyone's don't-wanna-act-like-a-grown-up fantasy, wheras under 'father' is a dot disappearing into the distance, possibly scattering money in his wake. And that does a disservice to both mothers and fathers."